Q: Do You enjoy what You do?
A: Absolutely. I wouldn't invest so much time, effort, training, planning, and own my own dungeon if I did not. I do not have sessions with those that I do not think I would enjoy.
Q: How do I set up a session with You?
Q: What if I am new to BDSM and have never had a session before?
A: Great! I love breaking in BDSM virgins, and introducing them to alternative pleasures. I abide by the BDSM community motto "Safe, Sane and Consensual". I will help you explore your desires and limits while respecting your boundaries. With time, you will most likely find that your boundaries and limits will change.
Q: I have a fetish involving specific toys and/or types of clothing. What should I do?
A: I have a fully equipped dungeon with numerous toys, as well as an extensive wardrobe. However, some people have unique toys and/or costumes that they would like me to use/wear, and I enjoy doing so, as long as you provide that which I do not already possess.
Q: I have been injured previously during "edge play" by a different dominatrix. Now I am scared to trust another one. How can I trust you?
A: You shouldn't trust anyone that has not earned your trust. However, you should give me a chance to earn it, as I give you a chance to earn my attention, because I have a good reputation in the BDSM community, have a public web page with pictures (meaning that I am not hiding anything), am committed to safety, respect of limits, make use of safewords, take an inventory of any medical conditions you may have that might either affect play or need attention, and I am skilled at what I do.
Q: Who is responsible for my safety during the session? You or me?
A: Morally (not legally) we are both responsible for your safety. Your responsibility is to clearly communicate with me before the session about any medical conditions you might have as well as any other concerns. During the session, it is your responsibility to communicate how you are feeling, to use the safewords appropriately, and to alert me immediately if you are not feeling well or if you have reached either a physical or mental boundary.
It is my responsibility to listen to you, respect your use of safewords, pay attention to your biological and emotional signals, and act accordingly.
Q: Why don't you always use Dominant and submissive cultural capitalization in your correspondence?
A: Because although I respect BDSM cultural protocol, I am a very busy Woman and all those capitalization/slashes/and little letters take too much time!
Q: I have an unusual fetish. I'm looking for a mistress who wants to force me to bad things to my body - smoking, drugs, etc. Are you open to doing that? I can provide everything.
A: I respect all fetishes and don't judge someone based upon their fetish, because it is all a matter of personal preference. As a responsible Domme in the BDSM community, I abide by the "Safe, Sane and Consensual" motto. Although I do many types of edge play such as piercing, saline infusion, medical play with catheters, sounds, blood and fire play, these things are all implemented in a controlled fashion and I am trained in such matters. I also know that if done properly, and if the sub has been honest about not having any pre-existing medical conditions, these things cannot permanently harm someone. I enjoy edge play that may be painful or unusual, for in this the sub is opening him/herself up to new and intense sensations that induce a natural endorphin high that is safe for the brain to process. Introducing chemicals into the body's system such as drugs is something that I do not personally find in the "Safe" category of the BDSM creed. Being a Domme means that above all else, I am responsible for your well being in a moral sense, although not in a legal sense. Because of this, I suggest that we find an alternative outlet for you that does not involve potential health problems or death. I am very willing to work with you to find this safer outlet. What other fetishes have you tried? Have you tried other types of edge play? I would love to introduce you to some amazing endorphin rushes that you can have from other aspects of BDSM.
Q: Do you train people interested in becoming Doms/Dommes?
A: Yes, if I feel that the person will be a Good Dom/Domme. There are far too many bad Dom/Dommes out there, and if I feel that you will become one of them, I will not train you. Sometimes the difference between a bad and a good Dom/Domme is simply being a sub first. The best Dominants have been submissives, because this gives them a unique perspective that ennobles them with knowledge about power, pain, and instinct that they otherwise would not have. Good Dominants have a sense of responsibility, are in tune with their sub's physical and mental signals, and can most often tell when the sub is reaching a limit even before the sub tells them. However, it is still the subs responsibility to communicate to the Dominant. My time is valuable, and donations for an hour of training are accepted. Contact Me for details.
Q: Why do you refuse to do breath play?
A: Because it can very easily kill you, and I don't want to spend the rest of my life in jail for murder. For all of you who I hear protesting, read this first. I have one personal account to share with you, and one very well written article by Dr. Jay Wiseman, a prominent physician as well as BDSM participant.
My personal account: A well known and experienced Dom wanted to play with one of my male subs at a play party at my dungeon. He claimed to be an expert in martial arts and in breath play. He had said that he could do it just right, so that the person would experience the light headed dizziness without falling unconscious. At the time, I was busy tying up a female sub, and was listening to him talk, but not watching. I did not expect this experienced Dom to do anything to anyone else's property without asking permission. The next thing I knew, my male sub was on the floor spasming in a seizure. He jerked and seized for about 30 seconds, but it seemed like an hour. I was about to call 911 when he awoke from unconsciousness, saying, Where am I? My sub was later diagnosed as having a stroke. The damage the stroke caused is unknown.
The entire article regarding breath play by Dr. Jay Wiseman can be found here: an excerpt from it is copied and pasted below.
"I have discussed my concerns regarding breath control with well over a dozen SM-positive physicians, and with numerous other SM-positive health professionals, and all share my concerns. We have discussed how breath control might be done in a way that is not life-threatening, and come up blank. We have discussed how the risk might be significantly reduced, and come up blank. We have discussed how it might be determined that an arrest is imminent, and come up blank.
Indeed, so far not one (repeat, not one) single physician, nurse, paramedic, chiropractor, physiologist, or other person with substantial training in how a human body works has been willing to step forth and teach a form of breath control play that they are willing to assert is acceptably safe -- i.e., does not put the recipient at imminent, unpredictable risk of dying. I believe this fact makes a major statement.
Other "edge play" topics such as suspension bondage, electricity play, cutting, piercing, branding, enemas, water sports, and scat play can and have been taught with reasonable safety, but not breath control play. Indeed, it seems that the more somebody knows about how a human body works, the more likely they are to caution people about how dangerous breath control is, and about how little can be done to reduce the degree of risk." -Dr. Jay Wiseman
Q: Why do you blacklist most no-shows?
A: Because as you can read on my "Preparation for your session" page, many people reserve a date and time for a session, and then do not show up. Meanwhile, I have spent My valuable time preparing the dungeon for your appointment, my energy planning a deviously fun session, and my money on candles, heating/air conditioning the dungeon, cleaning supplies, and other supplies needed. Basically I am working for free if you don't show up. I am a professional, and expect you to treat Me as one. It is only fair that I am compensated for the time I spend preparing for your session if you decide not to show at the last minute.
When I hold appointments for you, I turn down other appointments from people for that date and time. Therefore, if you do not come to your appointment, you are costing me the entire session amount that I would have made had I scheduled someone else in your place.
Q: Will you travel to Dominate me? I am uncomfortable/too busy/ too far away to visit your dungeon in North Hills, CA.
A: Yes, but since packing all of my toys and traveling is such a pain in the ass, an extra 100 per hour donation is requested. A male escort will accompany Me. For out of town/out of state travel requests, all travel and hotel expenses must be paid in advance.
Q: In your email and phone responses, you seem to be very personable. But during the session you can be so controlling and sadistic! Why?
A: While communicating with you to set up your session I speak to you in a professional business-like manner. However, when you enter My dungeon, you come to Me as a Professional Dominatrix. The mood of the session depends on what type it is. I can be as cruel as I like during punishment sessions, coldly clinical or comforting during medial sessions, a nurturing Mommy to my BDSM "babies", or a mean Humiliatrix. Being a Domme is so much fun!
Q: How did You become such an amazingly talented, beautiful and delightfully wicked Domme?
A: You forgot to mention strong, bitchy, intelligent, and humble. If I give away all My secrets, you won't be able to add "mysterious" to your list of praises. Now quit reading and finish your application. I'm looking forward to playing with my new toy.
If you have further questions, you may email Me at: mistressaurora@ymail.com.
